Student Success Story: (Note: I received permission to share this story as written.) I love to see my students make progress, however incremental the step or small in scope! It makes all the work, on behalf of the student and teacher worth it! With my background as an adoptee with adopted siblings, I recognize that in order to succeed academically, many adoptees, especially those internationally adopted, often have emotional and spiritual needs which must be met and resolved in order to blossom to their full capacity.
Recently, I was tutoring a student adopted from Asia. They received no education for nearly 9 years while in their country of birth and faced neglect in their orphanage. Now, they have been in the USA several years and they are picking up the English at a first-grade level, beginning with the alphabet. As is common with many adoptees, my student, though very bright and capable, has some developmental delay and does not speak much English (and none of their birth language) having lived for years being neglected and not expected to amount to anything. This can result in extreme frustration, anxiety or lack of desire (a.k.a. "laziness" ;)) when, once home, adoptees are expected to learn. After years of having no expectations to amount to anything or being told they are "not worthy," or "not smart," because they are orphans, these feelings of inadequacy or inability may become learned and/or continue, even when they are home and have every opportunity to grow and learn. Thus, academics can be a struggle, not only because of the lack of education they are trying to overcome or learning disabilities, but also because of this emotional baggage, including a negative or disinterested mindset.
This background is common in adoptees and is the case in my student. Now, we have been working for days on writing, pronouncing and using the letter "A." My student understood the task, had been successfully writing the letter "A" with minimal help from me. They were clearly ready to advance to writing the letter independently, but, when clearly given the task with understandable instructions and encouragement, only proceeded to scribble, acting as though they could not understand, nor do as asked. On the third day with no progress, we set down our work and I kindly but firmly addressed what I understood to be an underlying issue: lack of desire, as work was never expected of them in their orphanage. (Whatever they wanted to do, they did. If they didn't want to do a task, no one made them.)
My student, understanding what I was addressing, shed a few tears. I then followed up with positive encouragement, in understandable terms, expressing my belief that they ARE bright, capable child and how happy I will be when they write the letter. It may be hard, I said, but now that they are adopted and have a family who wants the best for them, it's time to learn and apply oneself.
We then set back to work. After a few more scribbles, which we promptly erased and started over, my student clearly wrote the letter "A" by themselves AND spoke the sound aloud several times! This was huge success! The culmination of 3 days' work had come and was rewarded with many smiles and much praise! I was so proud of them and they were so happy with themselves! Though the experience was not repeated that day, the rest of the lesson went smoothly and ended with feelings of accomplishment and positivity for both the student and teacher.
I share this story as an encouragement to families who may be struggling and as a bright spot of joy! Progress achieved after true effort, no matter how small, is a cause for celebration! Adoptees especially might need to be firmly guided in the right direction and encouraged along the way, but the success that comes after the hard work and understanding of the deeper issues at play is beautiful each time.
